Ponderings....

How did number 2 pencils corner the market? What is it that makes them better for scantron test than, say, a number 3 pencil?

Is it wrong that when I see a person driving a Hummer I automatically think they are an asshole?
Subquestion: Is it wrong that when I see anyone with a "W" sticker on
their car I think they are both an asshole and a right wing conservative
scary christian.

I think spread sheets are overrated.

Today I turn 30 and for some reason that makes me nervous. Up until this morning, I hadn't thought much of it but right now I feel really nervous. Maybe it's the double shot rocket fuel coffee I am drinking. Maybe I am trying too hard not to think about getting older.

My mom just called and sang Happy Birthday to me and quickly reminded me that she is not old enough to have a 30 year old daughter. Apparently, she's wrong.

Minor Threat vs. Nike, Take 2

From Salon.com...

"Lindsay Lohan on her sudden skinniness: "People keep warning me, 'Don't get too thin.' I was never on a crash diet because that's not what I do. I could never be one of those girls who throws up after eating. And my mother would kill me if I did anything stupid. But I'm happy to have lost weight, and I'm working at keeping it off. Besides, Kate Moss is my fashion icon."

Last night I heard an interview with her where she told the reporter when asked about her weight loss something to the effect of her body just changed. She was 17 and now she's 19. Her body is that of a 19 year old now. Call me crazy but I gained weight between 17 and 19. Oh yeah, I went to college. Just think. If we had all not gone to college we would have never gained the freshman 15 and we could all look like skeletor. Damn that college.

Triathlon #2 of the season...

...went off without a hitch. Let me rephrase that. It went off without a hitch because I did not run it. This is tough for me to admit. I thrive on competition. The masochistic side of me likes to push my body and test its limits. I train all summer for these things and I have never backed out of one the day of the race. Along with being athletic, I am also a firm believer in listening to your body. Sometimes it knows best. That being said, here's how it all went down. I went out for a ride on Tuesday. I have a new bike that I really enjoy riding which is HUGE for me because I normally don't like to spend two hours on a bike. I find it to be a bit boring. The new bike is turning this around for me. It has some serious get up and go and, for once, it fits quite nicely. It doesn't give me back pain and the seat isn't too uncomfortable. Anyway, after my bike ride I just couldn't shake this terrible gut feeling I had that something bad was going to happen during the race. Not only could I not shake it that night but I had it for the rest of the week. This manifested itself into bad nightmares about wrecking myself in the middle of the race. I also was more stressed out this week than I had been since grad school. I had nothing to attribute it to except this damn race. So the night before, I decide to drag the boy downtown for food and a glass of wine to take the edge off. Nothing was working. I got myself so fired up that I couldn't sleep that night. I kept waking up every hour with my heart racing. I had terrible nightmares all night about seriously hurting myself during the triathlon. So, when I woke up at 4 a.m and still felt like a basket case, I decided I needed to bail out. At that point I had no sleep and I couldn't relax. This is no way to go into a race. So, I bailed. I never feel that way before a race. I am normally really mellow and focused. I have about an hour of nervous excitement right before the race starts and then I am good to go. This was so uncharacteristic of me. I think I made the best decision. No harm done just 60 bucks down the drain.

I have already picked out two more races to do next month. I'll let you know if I go mental on those.

Nike BLOWS!!!....

First it was sweat shops in Asia and now this. Eat a dick, Nike.

Camp KAD...

This past weekend I spent in the mountains. Cherry Log, Ga. to be exact. Nestled in the base of the Blue Ridge Mountains, it is a lovely little mountain getaway. I went there for one purpose this weekend...summer camp. Yep, you heard me right...summer camp. I was part of a special weekend involving women from their mid twenties to their mid thirties. We did nothing this weekend but eat grilled cheese, pancakes, french fries, fried pies, american cheese slices, and vegan chili and it was a blast. We drank too much, cussed to much, and laughed A LOT. We made keychain lanyards with inappropriate words or saying on them. Examples include but are not limited to "eat a dick", "nutz", "balls", "vas deferense", and "boobz guru". I made the boy one that said "foxy jugz". For two days, ten ladies had not a care in the world and I would like to speak for them all and tell you that we had a damn good time.

Things I Learned at Camp:

Pimento Cheese is disgusting

McDonald's fries and my stomach have not met in probably three years and will never meet again. They can't play nice.

I have some social awkwardness that manifests itself in talking too much and cussing too much.

I like sleeping on the floor.

Arts and crafts don't have to be stressful with the exception of ribbon barrettes. Mom, I am SO sorry I made you make those for me.

AADD...

I cannot concentrate today. I have at least one full day like this a week. I have sat down three different times today to write a simple two page summary of some work I have been doing but just can't seem to spit it out. I don't think it is going to happen today. I leave here in about 15 minutes and I will probably take it home with me. Then I will start running around like a maniac to get ready for leaving town tomorrow. After meeting friends for a drink, going to the gym, and taking the dog to the park, I will most likely sit down to write it tonight and fall asleep with pen in hand. Then tomorrow morning the battle of wills will begin again. Do I finish writing it so I don't have to deal with it on Monday....or do I look at shoes online? Do I finish writing it so I don't have to deal with it....or do I check my email? I swear the internet is the kiss of death to my productivity. It's so distracting and awesome all rolled up into a nice little package accessible to me by a simple click of a shortcut on my desktop. You may be thinking "damn, just show a little restraint and get some work done!" That's a nice thought but when you sit in front of two computer screens all day it is really easy to just click on Internet Explorer and take a brief hiatus from the world. I can read the news. I can check the boys website to see if he has updated it. I can search eBay for random things like Jesus action figures or Jadeite kitchen stuff. It serves it's purpose as a distraction. I don't take smoke breaks or wander campus trying to distract myself so it's justified. Right?

Paper Clips and Tape dispensers...

There is something strangely fun and gratifying to me about buying office supplies. I like seeing what's out there. It reminds me of back-to-school shopping with Mom minus the trapper keeper with the kitties on it and the Barbie backpack. Getting a new desk calendar is exciting. Don't get me started on mechanical pencils and how awesome my new one is. Office supplies are good. I didn't think it could get much better than buying new office supplies (with the exception of buying shoes which trumps any and all retail purchases) until now. I don't have to buy them any more because I have an entire closet full of FREE office supplies at my disposal. Did I need the paper clip caddy? No, not really but it was free so I took it. Did I need the multi-colored paper clips? Nope, but I could take them and not think to myself "the metal ones are cheaper." Did I need that sharpie? Sure didn't, but it will right better on the mix CD I have to burn for my weekend get away so I took it. Don't get me wrong. I am not taking all the free goodies home. This is strictly work goodies. But I must admit that I try to take at least one trip a week to the closet and it makes the work day just a bit brighter especially with a bright orange highlighter.

Spam...

From: Juan Villarreal
Subject: Re: With travel in urine planner

From: Martha Stiles
Subject: Re: was swim so calculator



Ummm...OK?

TP Girl Update....

It has gotten worse. Much worse. TP girl, toilet paper on the seat, no flush, floater!

A Few Reasons...

I am the new owner of a spanking new satellite radio system and I have to tell you ...it kicks ass! A friend of mine introduced me to SIRIUS radio while we were working at the nuclear facility in Aiken, SC. I always thought that it was cool and I found it interesting to think about satellites beaming down at my car. I kept mentioning to the boy..."I really want satellite radio" (pretty fucking subtle, right?)> Well, the boy came through and performed a preemtive strike. He bought me SIRIUS for my birthday and gave it to me early before I went out and bought it. Here are some things I like about serious radio and a few examples of why:

Left of Center: Satellite radio's version of college radio. While they tend to play the same 30 songs over and over again (The Kills, Postal Service, Ryan Adams, etc.), it beats the pants off of listening to the wanker DJ's on my local college radio station.

NPR: Not only is there one but two NPR channels. You can never get enough liberal journalism. Not to mention my increasing disgust with CNN. They may have the single worst anchor people that ask the same damn question over and over again in a different way..."Would you say Catholics support this new Pope?" "How do Catholics feel about Pope Benedict the whatever?" "Will Catholics back the new pope with as much zeal and John Paul II" blah blah blah.

Back Spin: Old school hip hop with some occasional new school classics. So far today I have heard Grandmaster Flash, Curtis Blow, KRS-1, Snoop Dogg and Dre, Funky 4+1, Queen Latifah (before she got all glam) and all the Run DMC I can stomach! It's just so good. It just confirms how incredibly crappy hip hop is today.

Pure Jazz: No new contemporary jazz but good old stuff. Miles Davis, John Coltrane, Charley Parker, Tholonius Monk, Herbie Hancock, and everyone else you could ever imagine. There's something to be said about driving on a sunny day with jazz in the background.

HardAttack: All metal/hardcore all the time. I think I have heard every song off Master of Puppets over the past week..which is a good thing. The boy loves this one. Every time I get in my car after he has been driving, I start the car and get blasted out by Lamb of God or Messuggah.

And the best part of it all...I can stream it through my computer at work. So while I am trying to figure out what the hell source code is and how I edit it I can rock out to the Sugar Hill Gang. Not so bad. Not so bad at all.

Flying V's and Frat Boys....

This past weekend was good. It was my old dear friend Shmegs birthday which was celebrated with vegetarian cook out and beer (well, wine for me). Her boy friend has mastered the art of grilling saitan which is a feat in and of itself. Thanks for the grub Shmegs and Matt. Following the cookout the boy and I headed to the fabulous 40 Watt to check out My Morning Jacket. Not being super familiar with the music (at least that's what I thought until their set started up and then I realized I had heard the first 4 songs on the local college radio) I was not too sure what to expect. The crowd was riddled with drunken frat boys, half dressed sorority girls very concerned about ruining their new heels with bar sludge, hippies, and the occasional scenster. I went in with no prejudgement and actually enjoyed the show until I realized how bad my back was hurting because of the flats I was wearing, how smoky it was in there, and how old I had gotten. That said, My Morning Jacket put on a fantastic show. The band was energetic and entertaining except I could not let go the amazing resemblance the lead singer had to Zach Galifianakis. Then there was the flying V. Yes, the lead singer played the flying V and I have to say it was awesome. It could have been very cheesy but he refrained from straddling it while he played or licking the neck of the guitar. He just played it. And it was good.

Sunday, I went to the boy's sister's baby shower. The boy is about to be an uncle to TWINS. The baby shower was fun. No terrible baby shower games but I was bombarded with the inevitable questions....

Them: When are you and the boy getting married?
Me: Don't know. You should ask him.
Them: When are you going to have kids?
Me: Not a snowballs chance in hell, lady. Especially after what I've heard here today!

By 8a.m. it had already been one of those days....

I woke up frantic and anxious this morning. I was late, had no clean clothes, and my hair was doing something really strange. Maybe it is the bizzarro weather the south is experiencing. I mean it is June and I should be bitching about how unbearably hot it is and how I take a shower and start sweating before I even leave the house but instead I have on a jacket IN THE SOUTH IN JUNE. It's no wonder I have felt just a little off lately. I don't think I am sleeping well and when I do sleep I have insane dreams. For example, last night I dreamt that I was running through a mall in a see of people looking for the hospital in which I was slated to have knee surgery. Apparently, Macy's had a hospital department and I was frantically trying to find it. In addition, I had the flu. Upon finding the "hospital" I was told that I could not have my surgery because I was sick. It would have to wait. Then I woke up.

I just can't seem to relax anymore. You would probably suggest the following to aid in relaxation (in no particular order):

1) exercise...check and double check. Some how on my lack of sleep I am able to cram in a good bit of exercise. I have another triathlon at the end of the month so there is no time to slack off.

2) watch movies...yep. been doing a lot of that but the most recent (The Manchurian Candidate...yuck) made me so crazy I made the boy turn it off before it finished. Not relaxing in the least. So I have moved on to Sex and the City: Season 1 but that sort of stresses me out because I look at all the great shoes and clothes and worry about money.

3) hang out with friends...I do a bit of that but the schedules are so hectic we rarely cross paths.

4) drink....every night I have a glass of wine with dinner and then stress out about "drinking too much," "not getting to bed early enough," "red wine teeth," etc.

So what it boils down to is I am wound up tighter than a clock and it is manifesting itself in a lack of sleep. I agree. I worry about some stupid shit but that's me. I am a worrier. Even when I have nothing in my life to stress me out (i.e. I have a great boy, a great dog, good job, functioning car, great group of friends, great health, great parents) I find menial things and I stress. This is not a pity party for sure. All in all I am really happy but just a little tired and tense. I need a diversion. You know something like cow tipping or roller skating.